‘Turn, turn, turn.’
Now, this is supposed to be the season of peace so why is it that my dear children who know Santa is watching are fighting like cats and dogs!? We get out of school, and day one, they are already in their rooms for quiet time because they won’t listen to us or each other! Anna has whined she’s hungry 106 times and Brody cringes upon the sight of his sister. I look at Bo, I say I hope the whole break isn’t like this!
Day two was much better, filled with friends and even ice skating. As we fall into our groove, I have to remind myself something I have told friends and parents many times before. It seems like about every 6 months, they change. Just when you’re cruising along, they throw you for a loop. And, this summer was too easy as far as the kids go. So, I should only expect and remind myself that we are due.
I think all families must go through those phases where you’re just on each other’s nerves for no apparent reason. That’s how Anna and I started the break. Six and a half, and there are some growing pains. As children naturally progress through normal ages and stages, they grow not just physically, but also emotionally, intellectually, and hopefully socially. They are needier than normal and just more irrational and emotional, I think (or at least my nutty kids). As they try to grasp the need for independence, they’re uncertain about how to continue feeling safe and secure. They argue and talk back more. They stomp and pout. And, they wait until ‘3’ to decide to comply. That’s where we are. Merry Christmas to us!
It’s frustrating, confusing, and also super annoying when you think you’ve got a hold of managing their emotions and choices, and then they decide they want to do that themselves! It’s what we need them to do to grow into healthy, independent, and responsible children but it’s challenging as a parent to remain steady when their emotions are not.
It’s my job to be patient, supportive, and loving when it’s sometimes so hard to be! It’s our job to model what we expect and not yell back and grow emotional with them. Parenting is tough but like the title of my blog, it’s best when it’s purposeful. I don’t want to default to my children’s reactions but instead, I will choose to ride the storm. I will recognize that “this too shall pass”, just as my mom reminded me during the first 9 sleepless months of Brody’s life! We will encounter many more difficult challenges; this I know. So, if you too are in a challenging, fighting stage, know that there is a purpose and like everything, it won’t last!
“A time for peace; I swear it’s not too late!”